The Overwhelming Desires of a Writer
Writer Resilience plus TONS of writing resources
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The Overwhelming Desires of Childhood
My seven-year-old wants a Magic Mixie. (She's convinced they’re actually magical.) She also wants a scented Build-a-Bear with accessories and a set of troll dolls and a kittycorn squishmallow. When we go to to the grocery store, she wants freezer pops and gummy candy and pie-flavored yogurts with mix-ins.
And I get it. I remember the overwhelming desires of childhood. How desperately I wanted real Converse All-Stars (not the Payless knockoffs) and a historically-accurate American Girl doll with accessories. How I begged my mom (to no avail) to buy us Fruit Roll-Ups and Toaster Strudel. I remember the huge, painful ache for all the things I desperately wanted.
And I remember the childhood disappointments. Christmas 1989, when I came into the living room to find that Santa had not brought me what I’d asked for; not even close. That was the year I figured out Santa wasn’t real, and it hurt just as badly as when my dog Sparky got run over by a car the following year.
The desires, disappointments, and heartbreaks of childhood may be smaller than the ones we have as adults, but I think they hurt just as much. Maybe even more, because the ache is so big in those little bodies, in those still-growing hearts and minds.
“The Magic Mixies are real, Mommy,” my seven-year-old told me. “You say the spell and put in the potion, and the cauldron will keep making more and more stuffies. I can give stuffies to all my friends.” Apparently the commercials have convinced her that the Magic Mixies caldron is some kind of never-ending horn-of-plenty.
“I don’t think they would sell something that magical at the store,” I told her. I was trying to manage her expectations. She is so looking forward to getting a Magical Mixie cauldron for her birthday, and I don’t want her to be disappointed when it doesn’t perform the way she’s imagined.
“Well, Mommy, you never know,” she said.
The disappointments of the publishing world
I’m always trying to protect my daughters from disappointment. And yet, if I’m to prepare them for adulthood, I need to let them experience disappointments. I need to let them try things and fail. Because I want to raise resilient kids. Kids who know how to stand back up after being knocked down. Who see failure not as sign that they should quit, but as a sign that they need to change course and try again. Kids who deal with not getting everything they want.
The disappointments and unmet desires of the publishing world are also painful and plentiful. The contests you didn’t win. The work you didn’t get published. The piles upon piles upon piles of rejections. We writers have to be resilient.
No matter where you are in your writing and publishing journey, I’m sure you’ve experienced disappointment and rejection. And so you know how important it is to manage your expectations and try to let the disappointments roll off your back. To see rejections not as a sign that you should stop writing, but as a sign that you should revise and try again.
And, as hard as it can be sometimes (and believe me I am struggling with this right now!), we writers risk going off the deep end unless we can find joy and fulfillment in the writing process itself. To see our own creativity as a horn of plenty; a cauldron with the potential to surprise and delight us.
If you you’re still trying, you haven’t failed. And so you keep writing, knowing you might not get this one published, knowing you might not win this time.
But also, maybe this time you will. As my daughter says, you never know.
Goodbye, Grandpa
My grandfather, Peter Reynolds, passed away on Monday at the age of 100. I wrote about him recently because he was a writer and avid reader and all around interesting person. Though he claimed to dislike novels (a topic we often debated because… how…? How can a person not like novels??), he always asked me how my writing was going, which meant a lot to me.
In his honor, I’m sharing a short story I wrote many years ago — one of my most personal stories — that was based on something my grandfather told me at Thanksgiving close to fifteen years ago.
Writing News & Resources:
For All Writers:
Here's a list of 84 lit mags and publications currently open to submissions from That Book Chikka.
Fascinating post on “The Tiffany Problem” plus lots of great writing resources from
Looking to improve your craft? Check out the online fall class offerings from MFA For All — all taught by top-notch authors.
From Good Story Company:
Free online Editor AMA (Ask Me Anything) on Sept. 25. Bring your writing, revision, and publishing questions to their experienced panel of editors.
Free online Writing an Irresistible Query Workshop on Oct. 10
Listen to the latest episodes of This Mama is Lit, a podcast from Literary Mama featuring interviews with writer-moms.
Literary Mama (the online journal) is now accepting submissions!
All About Fantasy Virtual Full-Day Retreat on Sept. 28 from Bianca Marais, fantasy author and host of the great podcast The Shit No One Tells You About Writing.
Check out the free event replays of various workshops at Manuscript Academy.
NYC Midnight’s Rhyming Story challenge starts September 20. And the 250-Word Microfiction Challenge starts Nov. 8.
The Writers Center website is a GREAT resource for finding grants, fellowships, residencies & retreats, publishers (who publish non-agented authors), and literary journal opportunities.
Ready Chapter 1 is a community-powered platform connecting book publishers with undiscovered writers. Find peer critiques and more.
Writing Workshops also offers lots of online classes in fiction, nonfiction, poetry, picture books, and the business of writing.
Check out the meet-up group called Shut Up & Write. There are in-person chapters all over the country, as well online events.
NewPages has tons of submission calls from literary magazines and journals.
For KidLit Writers:
Free online workshop Writing Irresistible Picture Books on Sept. 26.
Enter the YA Open contest for prose in the YA genre. Deadline Oct. 1
The Story Mastermind Novel & Picture Book application is now open with workshops beginning in January. In just five months, you could have a complete, polished draft of your novel OR a complete portfolio of picture book manuscripts—and a plan to submit and launch it. Apply by October 15th!
Wow Con, WriteMentor’s annual online conference for writers of children’s fiction: Sept. 27-29.
YALLFest, the Book Festival for writers and readers of Young Adult will be held Nov. 15-16 in Charleston, SC. Keynote speakers have finally been announced!
A list of places that publish stories for children from The Write Life.
Literary Rambles has information on kidlit agents and agent interviews.
Submit your children’s book to these publishers: no agent required!
Here’s an incredible list of upcoming events for KidLit writers!
Check out SCBWI (The Society for Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators) for events, conferences, critique partners and more. (Picture book through YA.)
For Querying Writers:
Here’s a list of small publishers, most of which do not require agents.
Andrea Bartz has a list of successful query letters (many of them thrillers).
Pitch contests on Twitter(“X”) seem to be coming back. These events can feel like a bunch of authors screaming into the void, but it doesn’t hurt to try. After all, I found my agent through a Twitter pitch party. So read my article:13 Things to Know About Twitter Pitch Events then mark your calendar for these upcoming pitch parties:
#PitBLK on Sept. 21-24 for all authors of African descent will take place on the PitBLK website.
#KidLitGN on Oct. 2 for for writers and illustrators of middle grade and younger graphic novels. This event will take place on the KidLitGN website.
I occasionally choose a subscriber for a FREE submission package critique. Send me your query and first two pages, and, if I chose your submission, I will send you feedback on both. Fill out the form here.
Writing Conferences & Events:
Live in the mid-Atlantic region and looking for a writing retreat get-away?
2024 Writing Retreats at ZigBone Farm (Just one hour from DC/Baltimore area in Maryland's Catoctin Mountains). MD residents can apply for a grant to help cover costs!
September 22-27: Fall-on-the-Farm Women's Poetry Writing Retreatwith Award-Winning Poet and Writing Instructor Ann Quinn
The Writer’s Retreat at Good Contrivance Farm. Open year-round, the only requirement for this peaceful retreat north of Baltimore is that you use the time to work on your writing. Spaces normally book about two months in advance.
The James River Writers Conference in Richmond, VA is happening Oct. 4-6.
The Maryland Writers’ Association Conference is happening Oct. 19-20 in Baltimore. I will be on Oct. 19!
Rooted & Written 2024 Conference, Oct. 27-Nov 2 is a free in-person conference featuring Bay Area Writers of Color.
Thinking about going to a conference or applying for a residency? Check out the free searchable database on Poets & Writers.
YALLFest, the Book Festival for writers and readers of Young Adult will be held Nov. 15-16 in Charleston, SC.
The San Miguel Writers’ Conference and Literary Festival is happening February 12-16 in beautiful/historic San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. I’ve spent a lot of time in San Miguel, and it’s a great place to visit.
Are you an author who's had a book published in the last two years? The Annapolis Book Festival is now accepting submissions for our 2025 Festival, which will be held on Saturday, May 3, 2025.
The Writing Day Workshop “How to Get Published” Conferences are affordable and helpful. Plus, sign up for pitch sessions with agents for $29 a piece. For online conferences, attend from anywhere in the world! Check out the upcoming conferences:
Wow Con, WriteMentor’s annual online conference for writers of children’s fiction: Sept. 27-29.
Writers Digest offers loads of virtual conferences on a variety of publishing and writing craft topics.
For more writing conferences, check out this list or the free searchable database on Poets & Writers.
Funny I just wrote a post about resilience (to go out next week). Shows how important this topic is to us writers!
Eva, I'm sorry for your loss. Your grandfather looks like a strong person in this picture. My family had a small party for my mother when she turned 100 too. She was striking in her photo just like your grandfather is in his. She also passed on a couple months after her birthday. Always a goal setter, my thought has always been that getting to 100 was her last goal. Like the others she set, she made this one too.